


I am not a smile

by tigriswolf



Series: comment_fic drabbles [299]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Character Death, Future Fic, Gen, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-02 01:18:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6544567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigriswolf/pseuds/tigriswolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"When I was your age, I was scared of the dark, too," she says, and the girl gives her a sharp look. "Yeah," she continues, nodding. "And that was before I got Called and learned about everything out there."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title: I am not a smile  
> Disclaimer: the ones you recognize aren’t mine; title from Sylvia Plath  
> Warnings: references to violence, death, and abuse; takes place post season 7 and ignores the comics  
> Pairings: none  
> Rating: PG  
> Wordcount: 685  
> Point of view: third  
> Prompt: BTVS, Buffy, she used to be scared of the dark

"Hey," she tells the newest girl, found in a basement after her parents were killed by something, cowering in a corner and begging the air for her life. "Hey, it's okay to want a nightlight." 

Zoya can't be more than fourteen, and there's still bruises on her, and it's obvious that her life wasn't all that good before the whatever killed her parents. (And that makes the monster that all Slayers have inside growl a little, but Buffy got a handle on her monster a long time ago.) 

She isn't a Slayer, this girl, or a Potential. She's just a regular human, and it might be better to give her to the state. Except there's a flash of danger in her eyes, and regular human or not, she needs guidance. Besides, Buffy's school has plenty of people she can talk to about the monsters (human or not) that hunted her. 

"When I was your age, I was scared of the dark, too," she says, and the girl gives her a sharp look. "Yeah," she continues, nodding. "And that was before I got Called and learned about everything out there." 

"We can leave a light on, that's fine," Cally says, Zoya's roommate and one of the oldest girls in this wing of the dorms. She's Faith's most devoted disciple, which Buffy gets a kick out of, most days. But it's a relief, since it means she's got a deft touch with the ones who need the most guidance. 

Zoya still doesn't say a thing, but she does nod, so Buffy gives them both a goodnight smile, and leaves the bedroom door cracked behind her, then lets herself out of their suite and goes to patrol the school. 

She was afraid of the dark, once, before she knew what was in it. And then she spent a little while utterly terrified because she knew what was in it. 

She's not afraid of the dark anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Any, any, "If the world ends today I sure as all Hell am eating cheesecake for breakfast."

"Dawn!" Cally shouts, startling Zoya and causing her to spill her glass of lemonade. Thankfully, the girl next to her (Amara, Zoya thinks) is able to rescue her book before the lemonade gets it. 

"Thanks," Zoya mutters, carefully taking the book without touching Amara's fingers. Amara smiles at her before looking back at her phone, fingers flying as she texts someone. 

Zoya has no one to text. She tries not to think about it. 

"Dawn," Cally says, dragging a woman to the breakfast table, where Zoya and five other girls sit. The woman is tall, with long dark hair that looks kinda like— 

Zoya quickly focuses back on her book. Cally introduces the woman to the rest of the girls, but Zoya ignores everything, intent on her book. When she finally turns the last page, she's alone at the table—but not the kitchen, she discovers, as she sets the book down and sees the woman Dawn leaning against the counter and eating a piece of the cheesecake Annie had made yesterday. 

She says nothing but Dawn smiles at her. "I know, I should get something healthier for breakfast," she says cheerfully. "Not as young as I used to be." She chuckles even though Zoya does not reply. "But it's another godforsaken prophecy, and if the world is gonna end today, then I'm eating cheesecake for breakfast, you know?" 

Zoya does not know. But something about this woman reminds her of the woman who rescued her, blonde hair flashing, the woman who told her it was okay to still fear the darkness. So when Dawn offers her the last bite of cheesecake, Zoya accepts with a nod. 

She does not move from her seat and Dawn does not approach, but she leaves the plate with the last bite on the counter and exits the kitchen with another smile, and after counting to 60, Zoya rises and hurries over. 

She spends the rest of the day in her room, waiting to see if the world ends. It doesn't. 

(That night, when Cally finally shuffles in, smelling freshly scrubbed and limping slightly, Zoya murmurs, "Glad you're alright." Cally brightens but thankfully doesn't react beyond smiling.)


End file.
